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Are You Worthy?

I hear so many stories of why someone is not in a loving relationship when they desire to be in one. I hear about the person who is too old, the one who is not sophisticated enough, the one who is not emotionally connected, the one who is not interesting enough, the one who is not pretty enough, the one who is not entertaining enough, the one who is not confident enough, the one who is not successful enough, the one who is not slim enough, the one who is too quiet, the one who is not happy enough, the one who doesn’t have time, the one who has too many children, the one who is….fill in the blank.

This to me is called, so what! You are all worthy. This is called stuff and we all have stuff.

So what! Are you using this as an excuse?

Are you allowing this to stop you achieving what you want? If you believe nothing more, please believe this… YOU ARE ALL WORTHY!

Sure, everyone has a journey to go on and sometimes this stuff is getting in the way of meeting and sustaining a healthy relationship yet I have never met anyone who has a story that says they are not worthy. If you find that you are the one who ….. fill in the blank, and it really is stopping you then take the time to see how this story could be changed to rectify this belief.

We are programmed from such a young age to believe so many things that are limiting us in our happiness, our success and our joy. By taking the time to examine what it is we believe in and why will help you to highlight any old beliefs that need replacing with new ones. Often people carry beliefs that create boundaries that are really not there. These beliefs could be in-fact not our belief but that of our parents, or carer during childhood or teacher or childhood friend. Yet subconsciously we have taken on that belief and created a boundary that perhaps is no longer serving a purpose in our life. The belief or boundary may even be detrimental to our happiness. It could be a simple memory of being told that someone who is fat isn’t worth dating. Or someone who is quiet would be boring to be with. Or someone who hasn’t achieved wealth is not a good provider. These simple statements said in the past as a thoughtless statement could easily have impacted on your limited thinking.

I recently met a lovely lady who came to me wanting to meet someone to fall in love with. As I discussed with her the requirements she had in a potential partner, she shared with me it would be better if they weren’t attractive as someone who was attractive wouldn’t be interested in someone ugly like her. This women I can tell you was well presented, impeccably groomed, had a lovely clear and open face, was gentle in nature, a kind and compassionate women and someone who I felt presented beautifully. Sadly, her father had repeatedly told her as a child that she was ugly. Now a fully mature and lovely woman, she still carried this memory with her and truly believed what her father had told her. These early memories are so damaging yet with a little work can be changed to a new, authentic and much more empowering story.

Another man I met, now in his 50’s felt he wasn’t worthy of meeting a suitable partner although he desired one, as he had repeated been told in childhood from parents and teachers that he would never amount to anything. I however saw him as an interesting man who held a stable position in a solid company, had a very long list of interests that he had become quite accomplished at and had much to offer a potential partner. He was a man who potentially demonstrated loyalty, trustworthiness, reliability and a stability that many women would love to have in a partner.

Take the time to question why you believe what you do. Ask yourself is this belief still serving me? If the answer is no, then take the time to re-frame this belief into one that does suit you in the now and will enable you to be free. Re-framing beliefs is quite easy to do when you present evidence that shows how limiting to your experience this belief is. Step forward in the new you with a new belief that is now serving your highest good.

And in the meantime, while working on changing this story, keep telling yourself, ‘I am worthy’. Repeat it so often that you eventually start to believe you are worthy. Then as you do this, you will find your story starts to change.

So here is your new belief, ‘I may be ….. fill in the blank, however I am worthy’.

Yours in love, Jane xxx

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